So Tell Me About Yourself
Tomorrow I will go bowling with my best friend and two guys that she just met. My best friend keeps referring to this as a date. I don't like to refer to anything as a date because I am not good at dating.
Nor am I all that stellar at flirting. There are some born flirts and I salute them with their witty comments, suggestive innuendo and general with-it-ness.
I do not fall into this category. Most strangers do not like me on first meeting. Or even, say, the 3rd year after meeting me.
I guess it doesn't help that my main obsession when on a date is how to end it. There is nothing as uncomfortable as talking about yourself and trying to give a general idea of who you are to a complete stranger. I always feel like I'm in front of the big wigs at NBC wildly pitching my new fragmented show for the fall season. The pitch always goes horribly awry and I end up thinking, "Well this just sounds really bad. I guess I should have worked that plot kink out. Why did I tell him I've been arrested? That wasn't something I really wanted to divulge until the third season. That one was more of a cliffhanger."
Getting to know someone is hard.
Plus the older I get the more idiosyncratic I get, and I am sure that is the same for most people which doesn't help anyone.
If I like someone I start wanting to ask questions that will be eventual deal breakers should the meeting miraculously develop into a relationship. I don't want to waste anyone's time.
"Do you snore? If you snore, I'm calling for the check because I need to fall asleep to the gentle hum of my Cool Breeze oscillating fan and that is IT. No snoring. I dated a snorer once and spent three months glaring at him while he slept peacefully ---plotting to snuff him out with my pillow.
Can you hold your breath all night?
Do you even need to sleep in the same bed as me? Because I'm so used to sleeping in my own bed that the presence of another body now keeps me up all night. Can you sleep at your house....forever? Is that possible? Because I need to be alone. We'll be together, but you will be in your own house. How does that sound?
I'm not always going to be in this great of a mood. I can get downright gloomy. Is this going to be a problem?
And on and on and on.
It's hard to get to know someone.
Nor am I all that stellar at flirting. There are some born flirts and I salute them with their witty comments, suggestive innuendo and general with-it-ness.
I do not fall into this category. Most strangers do not like me on first meeting. Or even, say, the 3rd year after meeting me.
I guess it doesn't help that my main obsession when on a date is how to end it. There is nothing as uncomfortable as talking about yourself and trying to give a general idea of who you are to a complete stranger. I always feel like I'm in front of the big wigs at NBC wildly pitching my new fragmented show for the fall season. The pitch always goes horribly awry and I end up thinking, "Well this just sounds really bad. I guess I should have worked that plot kink out. Why did I tell him I've been arrested? That wasn't something I really wanted to divulge until the third season. That one was more of a cliffhanger."
Getting to know someone is hard.
Plus the older I get the more idiosyncratic I get, and I am sure that is the same for most people which doesn't help anyone.
If I like someone I start wanting to ask questions that will be eventual deal breakers should the meeting miraculously develop into a relationship. I don't want to waste anyone's time.
"Do you snore? If you snore, I'm calling for the check because I need to fall asleep to the gentle hum of my Cool Breeze oscillating fan and that is IT. No snoring. I dated a snorer once and spent three months glaring at him while he slept peacefully ---plotting to snuff him out with my pillow.
Can you hold your breath all night?
Do you even need to sleep in the same bed as me? Because I'm so used to sleeping in my own bed that the presence of another body now keeps me up all night. Can you sleep at your house....forever? Is that possible? Because I need to be alone. We'll be together, but you will be in your own house. How does that sound?
I'm not always going to be in this great of a mood. I can get downright gloomy. Is this going to be a problem?
And on and on and on.
It's hard to get to know someone.
posted by Tara Callahan at 9:32 PM
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